Aubrey (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
allfireburns) wrote2010-11-19 10:38 am
allfireburns) wrote2010-11-19 10:38 am
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Once upon a time I had control, and reined my soul in tight...
So I had a random depressive downswing a few days ago. Which, while random, is not all that unusual for me, and when it happens, I will usually count it a victory if I manage to spend less than a week just not getting out of bed.
And I did spend a day in bed, but... somehow managed to drag myself out of it after that. Not just bed, the whole... depressive episode. I'd be a lot more pleased about this if I could figure out how the hell I did that. Because, you know, that might kind of be something useful to know in the future.
I'm still poking my emotional state with a stick periodically just to see if it's going to fall apart the second I stop paying attention, but I actually seem to be fine. It's kind of freaking me out how fine I am. Still intermittently tetchy at the world, but I seem to be capable of feeling emotions other than HAET. SURELY THIS IS A TRAP OF SOME KIND.
And I did spend a day in bed, but... somehow managed to drag myself out of it after that. Not just bed, the whole... depressive episode. I'd be a lot more pleased about this if I could figure out how the hell I did that. Because, you know, that might kind of be something useful to know in the future.
I'm still poking my emotional state with a stick periodically just to see if it's going to fall apart the second I stop paying attention, but I actually seem to be fine. It's kind of freaking me out how fine I am. Still intermittently tetchy at the world, but I seem to be capable of feeling emotions other than HAET. SURELY THIS IS A TRAP OF SOME KIND.